NO Matter Who Pays, First Date Must be Cheap

The first date is always very very crucial to the development of any new relationship. If you can manage everything successfully, your first date will be a great one , but you will have a bad time on the other hand if you can't and you will find your relationship almost over!
The things you will do and the place you will select for your very first date should always be under great consideration. For men, it is quite important to keep trying to understand what the lady is thinking or what she wants. You can take her to do something she enjoys and everything else will likely fall into lace. but if you go somewhere boring, you will have a hard time making your beloved happy.

It is our common nature that we always expected a guy to pay for most of the expenses in a first date. The guy should pay, especially if he does the asking, but we encourage even a halfheartedly mumbled attempt by the woman to spring for something like a round of drinks, the tip, 10 percent of the bail bond. This is mainly because such a gesture works wonders to build up a new relationship.

Most often all of the responses were from guys, most o f whom felt victimized to some degree by women who wanted a free lunch, or dinner, or gourmet picnic in a verdant meadow (more about that later). Most Interestingly, no women in the meantime wrote in outraged about how our opinion perpetuates the stereotype of men having to coddle and take care of the opposite sex because they can't even take care of themselves.

In any case, one of the missives stood out from the rest, and not just because it sailed through the transom affixed to a brick. It was from a guy named Rob (we won't identify him further, in case he might ever want to try dating again), who felt we weren't hard enough on women who seem to expect to be wined and dined ad infinitum. To illustrate his argument,

he broke down his expenses fo r a recent first date, from $7 for parking to $95 for a comedy show and drinks. Oh, and with a high-end dinner in between. The total was around $200 for, he said, "someone I barely even know."

To which we can only respond, what, no private jet to Maui for a hot-stone massage in Hana?

Say what you will about who should pay for first dates (please discuss among yourselves, because we're officially sick of the topic), but Rob caused his own problem by going too far, too fast. And that's not something you'll hear very often from this space.

Which brings us to today's lesson: What is an appropriate activity for a first date?

(Let's stipulate that this is not an online-dating first date, for which the only acceptable venue is a Starbucks, or a crowded bar with two exits, preferably one near the restrooms. No, this is a true first date, arrived at only after a certain amount of flirting, emailing and driving by her house 50 times.)

The movies : No. Too much time spent in tortured silence. There will be plenty of opportunity for that later in the relationship.

Gourmet picnic in a verdant meadow : No. This smacks of trying too hard. And what if she doesn't even like beefalo jerky and Coors Light?

Parking, drinks, dinner, comedy show : No. See above. And Rob, enough with the dating cost/analysis spreadsheets. OK? Thanks.

Dinner : Yes. Provided it's at a modest place (sometimes knows as a "joint") that doesn't serve a diminutive entree on a plate the size of a manhole cover. The fact is, most women are uncomfortable with first dates that are too lavish. (Or have we been misinformed yet again? Ladies?)

Bowling : Yes. Because if one of you is demonstrably better than the other, you can put up the gutter bumpers and increase beer frames from one to three. In fact, we recommend that from the outset.

The Boardwalk (or amusement park) : Yes, if it's at night. Everyone looks better in the glow of pulsating neon. Particularly those who've just come from a grueling session at the Stardust Lanes.